no 37

Have you accidentally looked into the sun or bright light and then looked away, the image burned into your eyelids? That’s an afterimage.

Here's what I saw, heard, or sensed that’s stayed with me in the past week. Let’s begin.

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Messages from My Eyes: I'm Seen

I was so excited writing in response to your messages about Afterimage I forgot to share something vital with you.

Opening and reading each of your messages, my eyes grew hot and stung. Then, suddenly and unexpectedly, I felt thin ribbons of happy tears streaming down my face.

I was bewildered to be witnessed. And so grateful to be seen.
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Message from My (Future) Body: Ask Your Inner Grandma/Gramps/Grand.

Last Thursday, my writing buddy told me he wasn’t sure what to do next. Of course, it was much more nuanced than that, but in a nutshell, he seemed stuck. I had a hunch he knew what he needed or wanted, but something was holding him back.

What gets in our way can feel heavy and impossible to get around. And other times– usually with time, growth, and perspective- we see the molehill in perfect placement to cast a long, ominous, mountainous shadow.

I asked my buddy what if he called on his Grandpa. Not his grandpa, but his Inner Grandpa. The 80-year-old Grandpa version of himself.

“Go visit him and ask, ‘Is there anything you wish you would’ve done when you were my age? If you could go back in time, what’s the first thing you’d do? What would be exciting?’ Then ask if you could go with him.”

I later thought about visiting my inner Grandma and how I might be tipping my future history for the better.

Since then, I’ve taken my suggestion and have been calling on my own Grandma Ako.

She fed me, I poured her some tea, and I asked her all the questions. She told me to stop wanting, thinking, and waiting.

"Instead, see what happens when you notice the want. Find out what it's like to be you in your rawest and most unfiltered version. Live a little! You're 50! It's time!

Take that want and do things from that part of you. That want might go away if you start being you, Dear. Then you can see what comes up. What new wants do you notice? Those might be the actual wants, you know?

Go now. And visit again. Come for lunch, and you tell me what you're finding out."

Wise lady, Grandma Ako.

Question for you: What does your inner Grandma/Grandpa look like? Who are they? Where do they live? How do they love to spend their time? What does a typical day look like? Who do they spend the most time with? How did they get there? What’s one thing they’d suggest or invite you to do/try/enjoy today? What's left on their bucket lists? What’s one thing you can do to bring them joy today?

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